Boy, I am glad I am not a dude.
I tell you what. I am extremely thankful that I do not have the ability to impregnate a female. I will always be eternally grateful that I do not even possess the semen that women would require of me.
The controversy of pro-choice versus pro-life has been a long, tedious debate. All about whether women had the rights to their own body or not. It is heart-warming to think that so many people, women and men, are willing to stand behind women’s rights. It’s very commendable.
But what happens to the man involved in such a situation?
I frequent Reddit’s Relationship sub-reddit. I’ve come upon the same problem way too many times to count. A boy unknowingly gets a girl pregnant (she lied about birth control, etc) through a mistake of fact and no intent of his own. He comes to an internet community asking for help, for justification that he has a right to even desire escape.
And then the community rains down hellfire on him.
Remove gender from this person. Say it’s just a person who somehow created a child through no intention of his or her own, and then he or she is forced to take responsibility for the child with no questions asked.
Pretend it’s a woman in the same situation–oh RIGHT! Isn’t that exactly what the pro-choice movement is about? To fight for the woman’s right to choose whether she brings a child into this world or not? Whether she can decide for herself if she can be the capable parent that a child deserves?
So why is society robbing men of the exact same right? Why does he have no say in what happens after a boo-boo that ends up in pregnancy? Why is he labelled a coward and a scumbag for even contemplating escaping the responsibility he never signed up for? Why should a man be forced into parenthood while a woman in the same situation has champions fighting for her right to choose her own future?
Yes, there is a fundamental difference between the two. The woman has to carry the child, while the man does not. The woman has to birth the child, while the man does not. Nine months of pregnancy. Hours, maybe days, of difficult labour. Yes, those are huge concessions a woman would have to make. I don’t deny this. But what society is asking of the man after the child is born is no different from what it asks of the woman. Take responsibility. Raise the child. Give up your entire life plan and draw up a new one that now involves a new person you didn’t mean to create.
If we are so keen on society letting us women have the final say over the rest of our lives and how we want to start a family… why are we so keen on keeping this same right from the men in the same situation? The men who were tricked, the men who were duped, the men who were manipulated, into creating something they never meant to in the first place?
Why isn’t pro-choice applied to both sexes alike?